Thursday, June 24, 2010
Rest From Work
I'm taking a break from early morning starts.
I'm taking a break from difficult airways and back-to-back epidural placements.
I'm taking a break from preop evaluations that make me grimace, or mentally roll my eyes, or make we want to go back home, curl up under one of Ramona's quilts, and take a nap.
I'm taking a break from surgeons who repeatedly have multiple add-ons to their schedules.
I'm taking a break from nurses who think room air is adequate oxygen for desaturating patients, who announce in loud voices that if they were "anesthesia" they'd throw their bodies across the door rather than allow a particular complicated patient to be brought to the operating room, who question my not giving a certain drug without thinking that I might be trying to protect the patient from that drug's potentially deleterious effects, and who in general either aren't comfortable with acute crises or who think they know more than the rest of us do about how to handle them.
I'm taking a break from A-lines and those who might forego using them to monitor the induction of anesthesia in really, really sick patients.
I'm taking a break from the 2 a.m. pages that I get because someone else didn't put in the right orders for a patient.
All those moments are in the past and across the ocean now. Now I am in a time and space of healing and rest. I'll eat food from the garden and listen to music from my son's violin, the chorus of frogs at the pond, the birds and sheep in the meadows. Now I'll inhale the scent of honeysuckle, lavender, and roses all around me, and just be.