Showing posts with label The Mission. Show all posts
Showing posts with label The Mission. Show all posts

Saturday, May 19, 2007

Gabriel's Oboe / The Mission Revisited

Watched most of The Mission again last night just to revisit the film and the roots of my oboe longings. I remember seeing this movie in the theaters when I was in middle school and being incredibly affected by it. Seeing it as an adult has just added more layers of association and meaning to the experience. Wow. I thought it was amazing back then, young as I was, but now I can really appreciate what Robert Bolt as a writer, Roland Joffé as director, and Jeremy Irons as an actor did to bring the story to life. Irons really co-created the character of Gabriel, who became my ideal for The Guy to Look For (sans the vow of celibacy, of course). (Actually, I wanted a combination of Gabriel and Atticus Finch from To Kill a Mockingbird, with maybe a little Russell Quinn from The Seventh Sign thrown in - and I gotta say, I found a guy who fit the bill pretty well!). Gabriel has it all - he is strong but gentle, quiet but courageous, deep-thinking but with a capacity for humor and playfulness, a man with intelligence and faith and who fights passionately for the rights of children and disadvantaged human beings. Plus he's cute, multilingual, and has musical talent. Take out the name Gabriel and insert my husband's name, and it's all still true. Wow.

There's a great chapter in The Oboe by Geoffrey Burgess and Bruce Haynes about that powerful scene in which Gabriel keeps playing his oboe despite the Guarani spears pointed in his direction. The authors write about the symbolic power of the oboe, of its music representing the penetration of Gabriel's message into the Guarani spirit. My 6-year-old happened to be watching with me, and he was completely riveted (just for that scene - then I tucked him into bed before watching the rest of the film). What is it about a scene that is compelling to a viewer whether he's 6 or 60? Well, here, first of all, the hero scaled a rocky cliff with an oboe strapped to his back. Okay, that got my attention. Then, later on in the scene, it was the music that mesmerized us, and Gabriel's courage in the face of life-threatening danger, his dignity, his faith, his creativity, and his respect for the Guarani.

There are so many other treasures in this movie for me. I've always had a special affection for the Jesuit order. I love how the Jesuits value education and the intellect, and actually put some THOUGHT into their faith. Ignatian spirituality, too, is full of gifts - reminders to see God in all things, to do things for the greater glory of God, to reflect on moments in which God's presence is palpable, to labor out of love "and not count the cost." And, speaking of Jesuits, I got such an insight into what my beloved saint, René Goupil, must have gone through as a missionary to the natives of Canada, traversing rough terrain and encountering all sorts of perils, hostility, and suffering. I also appreciated the glimpse into colonial life - the societal norms, the architecture, the religious customs - having come from a country which was a colony of Spain for hundreds of years.

People eagerly criticize institutional religion so much, and I would be the first to admit that I have dealt with many, intense frustrations with regard to the deep wounds it can inflict. But this movie shows the precious heart of religious faith as I think its founders would have wished it to continue. It's at the grassroots level, with remarkable individuals like Gabriel - with the "little" people - that religious faith can shake off all the encumbrances and formalities that weigh it down, and the things that really matter can shine through. Love always, do not pass judgment or count yourself above another, show mercy, abhor violence, take care of each other...these are the "laws" that govern the truest followers of Jesus exemplified in the fictional character of Gabriel.

I was so exhausted from work yesterday that I didn't get to practice (I was kind of using The Mission as my vicarious oboe dose for the day). Today I tried a long F and got a renewed appreciation for the purity of that adagio in Albinoni's concerto in D. I doubt I could ever be advanced enough to play anything like that, but a girl can have SOME goals and dreams, right? So my little goals are to get some good basics down this year. Already I think I figured out how to make my starting notes a little better (I was able to do that tonguing thing, albeit inconsistently, better on notes that were in the middle of a measure, but initial notes - the "attack"- had always been a problem). It does work to think of saying "Tu." I confess after exercises I indulged again and sight-read the first half of O Come O Come Emmanuel just to see if I could do it. Can't wait till I can do it smoothly and make it SOUND like it's coming from an oboe!

I found a video clip on Youtube of Ennio Morricone conducting an orchestral version of Gabriel's Oboe. *sigh* Like I've said, a girl can dream, right?



Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Anesthesia Oral Boards: a thing of the past!

We weren't supposed to find out our results till the 25th, but I happened to check online last Friday, and I PASSED my oral boards!!! The last hurdle! Finally, the rest of my life can begin. No more dissing the kids in favor of anesthesia flash cards. No more weekends & vacations spoiled by practice questions. WOO-HOO!!! Free from the shackles & tyranny of medical certification! No more, "Wait-I thought you already passed your boards." Those were the WRITTEN boards, which we needed to pass first in order to qualify to take our the stinking ORALS during our first year in practice. Before that there were also the USMLE steps, three in all, which were licensing boards. Passed those a while back. So it's all finally OVER! Done! I can live the life I want, read the books I want, think the thoughts I want, Hallelujah!

So what did I do to celebrate? (Besides the obvious & obligatory guzzling of champagne, play-time with husband & kids, etc.) I started taking oboe lessons! (My first one, in fact, was on the anniversary of my graduation from medical school.) Am I crazy, starting such a hard instrument in my thirties? Probably. But would I be crazy not to try to fulfill a lifelong wish now that I'm not chained to my anesthesia review materials? I think so.

Today's lesson was only my second. After sounding like a dying duck (I thought) while practicing at home, I felt a little better when my teacher said my tone was actually promising. She also made a huge difference by shaving several key millimeters off my reed, a commercial thing which came with the rental & which was too long, & therefore quite FLAT. I can see why oboists are so meticulous, & sometimes even neurotic, about their reeds! Getting those shavings off made a world of difference.

I can honestly say I am madly in love. Well, I have been as a listener, for years, but now that I'm trying to play, I'm REALLY in love. I know it's cliché that seeing Jeremy Irons playing "Gabriel's Oboe" in The Mission in theaters in 1986 was the source of my oboe longings, but there it is. That, and years of ballet - all that Swan Lake, the Wedding pas de deux in Sleeping Beauty, the adagio in Raymonda's Grand Pas Hongrois, not to mention non-ballet favorites like Amahl and the Night Visitors, Concierto de Aranjuez, Enescu's Romanian Rhapsody #2, Brahms' Symphony #3...I've been wistful for years!

Still, people have asked me, "Why oboe?" I also often get asked, "Why anesthesia?" I won't go into any deep reflections right now, except I notice they have a lot in common: they're unusual, elegant, mysterious, & challenging and require great attention to detail, dedication, and diligence. Maybe you have to be a little "different" to be attracted to them...who knows?

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Addendum July 21, 2007:

If anyone's interested in checking out one possible path for preparing for the anesthesia oral boards, click here or at the link on the sidebar.